Piling On: That Whiney POS

As timely as ever here at TMHB (just wait for my twelve part series on Gretzky's High-stick of Gilmour), it's time to call a spade a spade; Sidney Crosby is killing hockey.

Background:

Among my friends and cohorts, I've given Sidney Crosby as much leeway as any non-Penguin fan should. He's young, he's under extreme pressure and he plays for one of the worst coaches in the game. Yeah, I know, 2 minutes for being an idiot (hangs head in shame).

However, recent-ish events have finally shown me the light, and I'll be damned if I'm going to hide it under a bushel basket!

Exhibit A: The Nut Punch

Have a look at the 0:47s mark of this clip:



As the commentator intimated in the clip, really how is that any different than anything we've seen guys get LONG suspensions for? The NHL suspends professional douchebag Sean Avery for six games for talking about his ex-girlfriend, yet Cindy gets nothing (heck, did it even get MENTIONED by the all-knowing Hockey Media in Canada?). Disgusting.

Exhibit 2: Getting Schooled by Ovechkin

Not sure if any in the Barilkosphere had the chance to see it, but the January 14th smack-down ^ on Crosby and the Pens by Ovechkin was a thing of beauty:



Ovechkin had Crosby on his knees picking up his purse more than a few times, before taking over the game in the third and absolutely dominating. Listening to how despondent the Pens announcers get near the end of the game literally sustains me; it's schadenfreude at it's best people!

Exhibit C: The 'Playoff Beard'

'Nuff said.

Fletch Lives!

Ah the more things change, the more they stay the same in Leafland.

Looks like the puppetmaster (for those of you that saw the bizarre show put on by Fletcher and Peddie during the presser from the ACC, you know what I'm talking about) has decided the best course to fixing the mess he created is to go with something old. Let's hope this summer brings us something new (in the form of a hockey man that will operate without interference) and something borrowed (like a sense of decency and class from one of the other hockey orgs). Needless to say the fans are blue and looking at the dearth of prospects in the org, aside from Pogge, they will likely continue to be for some time.

Of course, Fletch's arrival and the news coming out of MLSE suggest that this is indeed the logn awaited start of the always on the horizon 'rebuilding plan'. From MLSE's lips to God's ear if it is finally true this time. I am still not convinced that any hockey guy that could actually come in and right this ship would ever actually consider it given the behavior of the MLSE board and the level of interference that they seem to have. MLSE are going to have to pay someone a dump-truck full of money, which is luckily the only thing about owning a professional sports team they seem capable of managing. We shall see...

Ferguson Finally Fired

Alliteration aside, this should have happened last summer. JFJ and the MLSE board have managed to take a once mediocre franchise and turn it into the Cleveland Browns of Hockey. A team so mismanaged and inept, so burdened with bad contracts that the only hope they have is for a return to the 'old' pre-salary cap NHL. Even if there are trades forthcoming, which there should be, this team's only hope for a quick about-face is to convince the veterans to go and to somehow win the NHL draft lottery this season AND next. Talk about wishing upon a star...

Honestly, you would think an organization that also owns an NBA basketball team that seems to know how to manage their respective salary cap would at least have the nuts to, oh I don't know, pull their head out of the sand and ask the guys over in Basketball operations, "hey, so can you guys explain this salary cap thing?"

The MLSE ship careens on, throughout this whole debacle showing their true colours along the way. They hang JFJ out to dry in front of the entire hockey world, somehow expecting this sideshow to actually ATTRACT talent. With all the haste of a glacier, Peddie et al have effectively shown their cards to the world, shrugged their shoulders and let out a collective "meh" when it comes to the on-ice performance of their financially successful hockey club.

Battle of Ontario Losing Steam?

So the Gm's, busy schmoozing, boozing and taking in some of Toronto's culture ^ (nsfw), decided to stick with their original three-year plan and keep the current un-balanced schedule for next season. Glad you guys all got together to agree to do nothing. Actually, that sounds like every meeting I have ever been a part of, but I digress...

For Leaf fans, this can mean only one thing; 12 more losses to the Senators by at least a touchdown. Personally, besides the fact that I rather feel that the Leafs/Sens games have become a bore (well, after it is 5-0, so about 10 minutes in), I just don't like paying for NHL Center Ice so I can watch the Buds get taken to the woodshed by the laziest team in hockey. Maybe I can convince DirecTV to refund me for these games... and yes, the Sens are the laziest team in hockey simply because they have the laziest player in hockey, one Jason Spezza. He seems to have infected the whole team lately, and this is a point that even the most die-hard Sens fans (yes, both of you) could agree to. It was a struggle, but he somehow managed to wrest that title away from perennial front-runner Alexei Yashin. Kudos Jason.

Of course, in calling the Sens the laziest team in hockey, I open myself to criticisms like, "How can the laziest team in hockey beat the Leafs by 25 goals a game?". Clearly, logic would dictate that either: 1) The Leafs are the laziester team and I am a liar, or 2) my brain checked out long-ago when it comes to the Leafs and 'logic'.

Lets go with a little of both and call it even. I truly believe that the Leaf players are 'over' this rivalry. They are sick of playing the Sens, sick of looking at Neil furrowing his brow at the bench, sick of the whole deal. It's as if they decided, "Look, we beat them in the playoffs four straight seasons, they are dead to us."

I can't say I blame them for the attitude in general, but they are clearly forgetting one important point. They actually NEED to beat the Sens more than once a season if they would like to play hockey when it counts. Heck, I know I am sick of going into work everyday, with their dress-codes and their "don't sleep in your cube" rules, but I still have to do it. How else would I keep myself living the life of luxury, awash with the finer things ^ in life?

They have to suck it up and play like these games matter, because they do. Bitching and moaning about it, something they mastered during the Quinn era, is a cop-out and Leafs fans should rightly demand that they play these games with more passion. If the laziest team in hockey can do it, the 'new' Leafs sure as hell better match them out there inch-for-inch. If they can't man-up and play these BoO games with some passion and self-respect, something the Sens have shown in spades, I will gladly pass the torch of laziest team onto the Buds, because it will be well deserved.

The Toronto Mediots are at it Again...

If one were to be parachuted into Toronto, and handed a copy of the Toronto Star/Sun in the last week, one could have been forgiven for thinking:

1. On Friday, following a loss to Florida, the Leafs were the worst team in the NHL;
2. On Sunday, following a win over Buffalo, they are the best.

Leaf fans have a reputation, much of it deserved, for being irrational when it comes to the team in Blue and White. My contention is that the media in Toronto, the same ones who constantly remind us of 1967 yet in the next sentence call a team with middling talent a contender, are even worse.

The sheer amount of crap that the media spews should require a permit from the Toronto Department of Public Works. One example: "Wellwood may be the best playmaker in the NHL" says Al Strachan... right. Forget Thornton, Hemsky, Straka, and a myriad of other players who will end the season with more assists... Listen, I like Wellwood, but suggesting that he is the best in the league is something that even the most dyed-in-the-wool Leafs fan should recognize is capital B, capital S.

One more note of irritation to the yammering rag-writers... why is it that the Star and Sun file essentially the same stories each day? I have been led to believe that these two papers are competitors, yet almost without fail on any given day, I will find articles in both the Sun and Star covering the exact same topic with the exact same quotes.

People, this is a very unique Leafs team. They lack an identity, but have shown the will and the ability to beat the best teams in the league. They are not contenders, and they are not going to finish last. For once, let's try to actually enjoy the ride, without bloated expectations. A win IN Buffalo is a huge step in the right direction, but they play seven more times this season. The Buds will need to take half of those games to prove that the early season success is not an aberration. Have patience with the Leafs, and revel in the misery (short-lived I believe) of the early season failures in Ottawa and Philly.

Oy Vey... Sens 7 - Leafs 2

So, uh, how 'bout them Sabres?

What a spectacular performance. Kaberle, McCabe, Sundin, Raycroft, etc, etc should all send their pay cheques back to MLSE after that disaster of a game. Oh, that's right, games. What a showing by our big guns. They really stepped up and displayed the kind of determination and heart that a team that is short on talent will need to make the playoffs this season.

The only guys with any consistent jump were Stajan, O'Neill, Peca and Poni. The rest of the guys weren't even worth mentioning, not even worth the digital ink.

Does anyone on this squad even care? When the Sens were taking runs at each and every Leaf out there during the opening minutes, did they not say to themselves, 'Hey, my fellow millionaires, maybe we should actually respond, and you know, not embarrass ourselves out here for the second night in a row?'.

The first five games of the season are looking more and more like an aberration. It is clear that unless we can get some stability on the D, and McCabe and Kaberle can manage to pull their collective heads out of their asses, this is not a playoff team.

May Bobby Clarke's Hockey Headstone Read...

"Roger got cancer. That wasn't our fault. We didn't tell him to go get cancer. It's too bad that he did. We feel sorry for him, but then he went goofy on us."

Karma Bobby, karma. His 'resignation' couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. Having grown up in Lindsay, Ontario where the Roger Neilson hockey camps were held, I can say that Roger was one of the nicest, most sincere people in the game.

Bobby, I hope you never earn another dollar in the league you classless, dirty, ankle-chopping bastard.

In-Game Goat-Horns

God bless the Internet... 10 years ago you would have waited eagerly for three weeks to read in-game comments from a random guy sitting in front of the TV... uh, right.

Looks like more than a few Leafs are being sized up for the goat-horns through 1+ periods tonight. I won't mention names, don't want to jinx anyone, but my pick so far has a name that starts with 'K' and ends with 'aberle'. Ugh, another brutal effort so far.

Man, can Zherdev dangle...

I Hate the Shootout

This is in response to an absolutely great post over at Leaf Club ^. He is 100% correct in that we have absolutely nobody on this team outside of Sundin who even puts a kink into the other teams stomach.

My feelings on the shootout... I hate it.

Ok, hate isn't the right word... fear might be closer to the truth. Whenever a game goes into OT, I am usually very confident. The Leafs, if anything else, have shown a penchant for scoring OT goals, especially when it counts. But as the seconds wind down, I start to squirm and twist, my mind flooding with memories of loss after loss last season in this side-show spectacle.

Jason Allison taking one stride at center-ice then coasting the rest of the way in has officially replaced my recurring nightmare where the Leafs actually make the Stanley Cup final, only to lose in four straight 10-0, 10-0, 10-0, 10-0.

Side-bar... I actually saw a guy wearing a Jason Allison Leafs jersey two days ago... I don't even know where to begin on that one, except to say that it must have been his brother. Now that I think of it he was walking at a rather glacial pace.

My solution to this guaranteed loss? Suglobov. Since he can't seem to crack the lineup, and doesn't seem to know where his own end is, put him out there in the one place he does seem to excel... skating as fast as humanly possible away from the Leafs zone. Give him a puck and a stick and, who knows, he might actually score for us.

Musings: Suglobov Looks Terrible

This guy is by all accounts a real offensive firecracker, but he has looked capital B brutal out there in his limited opportunities. I hope that he shows the hockey sense to figure out where his own end is, but I fear that he would only really work in the Leafs lineup on lines #1 or 2, not as a fourth line 'grinder'.

If Suglobov plays tonight, it will be his make or break moment for the first-half of the season. If he stinks the place out again, he will be dispatched to the Marlies to see if he can learn to play a more complete game. If he plays well, he could easily and immediately gain more ice-time. As coach Maurice has demonstrated in spades this young season, guys WILL be rewarded for their efforts ^.

No Lead is Safe

Leaf fans can attest to that after that terrible third period they played on Thursday.

It is one of the great things about the re-birth of the NHL. Teams are never out of a game, no matter the goal differential. I used to be a big fan of the grinding style of play we saw just a few years back, but in 2001, a two goal lead in the third was money in the bank. Heck, a two goal lead in the second period and it was pretty much game over as the opposing team would simply throw a blanket over the other team in the neutral zone.

Not in the 'new' NHL. The Leafs, not used to playing with a lead over the past season or so, clearly gave a demonstration in what not to do with a lead. They should have kept blasting Marty with pucks, they should have kept skating... but they choose to sit back, taking a number of stupid penalties. Throw in some non-stellar work between the pipes from Aubin, and you have a recipe for disaster.

Calgary tonight, which should be a real barn-burner in terms of energy and atmosphere. Man do I wish the Leafs had Iginla...

Eddie Returns!

It doesn't quite have the drama of Cujo returning (karma is a b!tch Cujo), but Eddie the Eagle returns this evening to Toronto.

There was lots of noise made by the mediots this summer about Eddie and his poor play last season (agreed), but you know what? I have no ill-feelings towards him. By all accounts, he was a 'good soldier' while with Toronto, and he certainly cannot be singled out as the only reason the Leafs missed the post-season last year. He is also not to blame for his sweet-heart contract that handcuffed the Leafs (thanks JFJ).

At the end of the day, he is a first-ballot hall of famer who played two mostly productive and one disappointing seasons with the Leafs. He never demanded a trade, or caused dressing-room drama, and he didn't turn his back on the franchise like a certain goaltender we all know.

I actually hope he plays very well this evening, just well enough to lose by a goal to the Buds!

Needling the 'Sainted Sens': Scowly McNeil

My new name for Chris Neil. He's got two facial expressions: an over-the-top scowl/grimace that looks like he is in a face-making contest with an eight year old kid, or the 'happy face' that he makes when he does something of acheivement (like finishing a Popular Mechanics for Kids magazine or remembering that the stove is hot and he shouldn't touch it).

Man would I like to play poker with this guy.

Needling the 'Sainted Sens': What is a Sens Fan?

Seeing as the Sens did not exist a mere 15 years ago, this question naturally arises in the minds of many Leafs and Habs fans.

Really, there are only three possibilities, in my view:

1. The current Sens fan was so young that the Sens are in fact the team that they grew up with and naturally followed;
2. The current Sens fan was not a hockey fan before 1992, or;
3. The current Sens fan was a 'fan' of another team and happily abandoned their original team for the upstart Sens of the mid-90's.

[grumpy old man mode] Situation #1 means that the Sens fan in question is probably no older than say 25, and therefore we can gladly dismiss their opinions/beliefs/ideas without merit. Sure, give them another 10 years, and they will be the died-in-the-wool fans that they claim to be, but c'mon, you gotta earn it kiddies! We call these people "children".[/grumpy old man mode]

Situation #2 implies that they are likely older than 25 (much older), and are essentially a born-again hockey fan. These types of fans tend to be the most enthusiastic, and yet at the same time, the most easily dismissed. Why? Because it is very likely that they have never strapped a pair of skates on, and have never taken a half-frozen street hockey tennis-ball in the nuts. This is an automatic disqualification in the world of hockey fandom. These are your "born-agains".

Situation #3 is the saddest of the bunch. In this case, the fan is likely to be in the 25-40 year-old cohort, and probably claims to be a 'life-long' Sens fan. In reality, they were most likely a Leafs or Habs fan from birth, and only converted to being a Sens fan in the mid to late 90's when they hitched their ride to the 'new hotness' that was the up-and-coming Sens of that era. They have forsaken their original team for a temptress dressed in red and black, one that will prove to be a harsh mistress come springtime. We call these people, aptly, the "traitors".

So which one is it Sens fans? Are you a child, a born-again, or a bandwagon jumping traitor?

Fire in the Belly

As in, the Leafs will need some. After the late-game shenanigans of the unchallenged Chris Neil, the Leafs will need to come out tonight and actually, you know, play as if they want to win. I know, we can't expect the boys to get fired up for every game of the season, but certainly a season opener at home against your biggest rival should have been enough for the underdog Leafs. Of all the aspects of last nights game, it is the shoulder-shrugging attitude that bothered me most. Play with some pride!

Prediction: While the game last night was mostly boring and listless, I have a distinct feeling that both Neil and McGratton will be looking to fire up the hometown crowd this evening. Who is going to step up for the Leafs?

We can count on Mats and Peca responding, IMO, but will the likes of Tucker, Kilger and McCabe? Kubina will be an added pressence, and a few well placed early hits to Spezza would go a long way toward giving the Leafs a real shot at winning this matchup. Unfortunately, as bad as Belak was he is basically the only guy on the roster who can handle either of Neil or McGratton, so look for him to be inserted on the 4th line.

The O'Neill Saga Continues

http://www.torontosun.com/Sports/Hockey/2006/10/04/1949276-sun.html ^

Looks like the drama surrounding O'Neill has already started, and we have yet to drop the puck. The best part of the article is this:

'...O'Neill implied several times that he would examine his options if the Leafs brass is not happy with his performance...'

This guy has should be pissed, and this should motivate him, but idly threatening to 'explore his options' because he is finally getting called out for his lazy, indifferent play is laughable.

Jeff, it is time to deliver something positive every game, be it a goal, a hit or heaven help us, a decent back-check, else you need to STFU and 'explore your other options' ASAP.

The Lou Bashing Train

A short note here...

Let me say that Lou is, in my view, one of the two or three best GM's in the NHL (wow, really sticking my neck out there...) The guy has managed to keep a competitive team through seemingly thick and thin and even though he showed a few chinks in his armour with the original signings of Mogilny and Malakhov, he has performed nothing short of a miracle to get out from under their contracts.

Whether you agree with it or not, he has found a loophole and exploited it. Fellow blogger ninja, over at Raking Leafs, has a great piece ^ on the whole situation.

Now, having said that Lou seems to be some kind of magician, I still think he is a loser on this one at the end of the day. He essentially gave up a first-rounder next season for the 'services' of M & M last season (and for those who saw them play, it wasn't worth it, not by a country mile).

Folks, you can make fun of the Devils for playing in a swamp, or playing in front of barely 10,000 fans most nights, but you simply cannot argue with success. Ultimately, players win games, but it was and has always been Lou's mastery at player management and in this case, finding 'loopholes', that has enabled this on-ice excellence.

If anyone is to blame for this, it has to be the good people at the league offices. They left the door open, and the horses are now out of the barn.

Fearless prediction: Bobby Clarke uses the 'Lamoriello rule' to get rid of Hatcher at some time this season, before the rule can be changed next off-season.

Needling the 'Sainted Sens': Corvo Ain't Exactly a Saint

Since the Ottawa Senators brought Joe Corvo on-board to help offset the loss of Chara this off-season, I have had more than a few of my sens-friends tell me what a great addition he is. They will then, as is typical, launch into some rant about what a bunch of no good, dirty SOB's the Leafs are, taking shots at various players for their apparent failures, both on and off the ice.

A refresher:

"...Prosecutors said Corvo, a 6-foot-1, 213-pound defenseman,
grabbed a 34-year-old woman's buttocks last November. Restaurant
staff told him to leave, but Corvo returned, punched the woman and
then kicked her when she fell to the ground, prosecutors said..."

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/wire?id=1648511

Corvo later went on to plead guilty. Maybe that halo hovering over Kanata just got a little more tarnished?

My Kingdom for a Winger...

I know I am just repeating what every single Leaf fan has heard, thought, dreamed, translated into Esperanto, but seriously, why can't the Leafs draft and develop a single top 50 NHL forward to play for them?

I urge you to name the last great forward that the Leafs have actually developed in-house. The Sens, for their part, have managed to bring up a Hossa, Alfredsson, Yashin, Havlat, etc. Sure, they sucked for about a decade and typically had a great draft position, but what about a team like Detroit? They were and are perennial favorites, have drafted lower than almost any team in the league and have still managed to draft and develop the likes of Zetterberg and Datsyuk.

Don't get me wrong, even through their inept drafting, a few decent prospects HAVE worked their way through the system and are now playing in the NHL. Just on different teams, of course. Take Brad Boyes for example. Shipped to the Sharks for Owen Nolan, and mystifyingly traded to the Bruins shortly after that, he has begun to blossom into a legitimate first-line NHL player, and would have made a serious run at the Calder last season if not for a certain pair of generational phenoms in Pittsburgh and Washington.

Or how about Jarkko Immonen, sent to the Rangers to rent Brian Leetch for a few short weeks? Immonen went on to lead the Rangers AHL affiliate in scoring last season, and appears as of this writing to have made the big club in the big apple. Look for a solid season out of Jarkko.

Maybe young Czech Jiri Tlusty, drafted in the first round of this year, is a step in the right direction. Refusing to part with Alex Steen in the rumoured Pronger deal is also a positive sign. It is certainly a refreshing change of course that has seen picks and what little prospects the 'Buds' have being shipped out every spring in a desperate attempt at a Cup run.

Only time will tell of course. Oh, and the answer to the question above, 'name the last top 50 forward that the Leafs have actually developed in-house...' is Vincent Damphousse. Scary, isn't it?